After a long time...

It's been almost a month since I wrote something. Since then I do not think I have any posts. On June 25 the library stopped issuing books and since then I am stuck with my computer and myself. So far I have some Tv shows; some of them were incredibly interesting. But my favorite was The Blacklist. 

    

    I have been waiting for the final results to arrive since I don't know how long. A few days earlier the results of the eighth semester arrived. My CGP in it unbelievably was good or at least what I think it is. It was 7.58; FYI I have never had any CGP as high as this one. So obviously I was thrilled to see the results. But unfortunately, that was all that came. I have some re-appears whose results haven't arrived yet. I am impatiently waiting for them. After it will be clear when I will be leaving India. My visa will expire on 30th July so technically I have only another 18 days to stay here. After that my room will be taken away from me; I will be kicked out of campus once and for all. I really want the results to come as soon as possible so that I can leave with dignity and peace of mind. 

    I and some of my fellow mates went to the  Academic section to discuss our results but they did not allow us to enter that fucking building. That arrogant Dean did not even answer our calls. It's so stressful and frustrating to see that no one gives a rat's ass about our situation. When we talked to Director inside campus when he was doing his routine jogging in the evening; He told us that we can leave as soon as we want and that they will post our transcripts to our embassy in New Delhi. Although we agreed with the director at that time but later when we discuss the matter among us, no one seemed to be satisfied with what the director had said. Posting the documents is something that never happened before. And that's why no one is sure that this will even happen. I told them that I will leave with the first flight available if they agree to process my documents with theirs. Ali and Atiq were fast to respond. they were eager to stay. Atiq told me that he won't leave until the declaration of the final results. Now I think I will leave ASAP. Because I am exhausted from wasting my time here. Also, ICCR did not send us any stipend this month, so technically we are graduated in their eyes and henceforth we will not be receiving any money, and we must survive on our own. 

    Nothing is going on the way I had planned it to. And honestly, I am not an optimist about the future, not even a little bit. I know nothing good or special is waiting for me in Afghanistan but my time here has come to its end and I should leave now. I need time to figure out my next plan in life. What am I gonna do now that I finished college? By my results, it is crystal clear that I am not eligible to apply for any scholarship, not by any long shot. My only option here is to find a job by any means, no matter meaningless or mediocre that might be. I need to support myself financially and move out of my parent's house as possible because I can not live there anymore it's more crowded than my college campus. 

    And one last thing, I ordered a new book a week ago from Amazon It will arrive in one or two days. I am looking forward to enjoying my last book before I leave.